Don't Lie

For a little over a week now, these two words have echoed though my mind.

As a parent to five children, honesty one of many values I've tried to instill.


"Don't lie to me, you'll only get in deeper trouble".

"Don't lie, as one lie leads to another".

I realized that while truth is something I've stressed, I've also unintentionally encouraged my children, to lie.

How many of you with young children have heard them remark at one time or another something undesirable to someone and have unconsciously encouraged a lie? Young children are so honest, purely innocent, until we make it otherwise. They say things like...

"You have a fat belly, is there a baby in there?"

"Your butt jiggles when you walk."

"You smell funny, you need a bath."

When we hear our children say things like this, we shudder. And more often than not, in a round about way, we encourage lying. We tell our children they cannot say those things because it hurts their feelings, or "that's not nice". Our intent is to teach our children when it's important to "keep quiet". I'm not quite sure how it happens, but I think somewhere in raising our children we may unconsciously encourage lying. You know that "little white lie" won't hurt anyone. Keeping quite is by far better the better choice when truth may hurt someone. But lying, is clearly not the best option. "If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all".

About a week ago, I told what I felt was a "little white lie". What I found out is...a lie is a lie!

Just as scripture tells us that to hate your brother is the same as murder, the Lord gently reminded me, through consequences...a "little white lie" is a lie...a sin.

At first, I truly believed lying was acceptable, as the outcome wouldn't change. I convinced myself that to lie even though the Spirit was convicting me otherwise.

As the Spirit revealed the error of my ways, I asked myself...

"Why did you lie"? Fear!
Fear of consequences and fear of retaliation towards an innocent person.

Fear birthed protection, protection birthed the lie.

Again, back to my children. I couldn't help but realize that in some circumstances, like me, their lie is from fear. Mostly, fear of consequences. I started re-examining my heart in this situation, as right before my very eyes, this one lie, began to snowball out of control. One lie, lead to another, then another...finally...CONFESSION!

I've always told my children, if you tell the truth your consequences won't be as severe. This doesn't mean there won't be consequences as a result of your wrong (sin).

Ephesians 5:13 But everything exposed by the light become visible.

Jesus is the light, and through the Holy Spirit, He exposed in me what's needed to change. Yes, there were consequences, but God is rich in mercy.

A few days later, my son and I were on our way to the orthodontist. He had lost a bracket, several days prior. They always lecture about the importance of coming in right away to get that taken care of. I don't like going back and forth to the orthodontist. In the car on the way, I told my son to tell them he just lost the bracket this morning. LIE! Immediately...the light! I couldn't believe I actually encouraged my teenage son to lie. Ugh! Yes, I did the right thing. But why a lie? There was no fear, I just didn't want to hear the lecture.

This was a wonderful moment for both my son and I. He got to witness how imperfect I am.  How I humbled and became obedient to the Lord. Most importantly, he saw the Lord's grace as we told the truth. There were no lectures.

For me, the most beautiful moment is; my son, who doesn't know the Lord, saw the Lord through me. Now that's awesome!!